Thoughts from a Weird, Strange, Funny Girl
I hate the sound of my own voice, I always have. This is a funny confession for me to make as most of the time, my friends have a hard time getting me to shut up. This is mostly due to the fact that I hold so much in that when I see them, it is like an explosion of sound. I hold in a thousand of observations, questions, news stories and just general funny events just to be able to share it around them. Also when inevitably one of them always does something hilarious, or myself, I have to share it with the other.
But this is the anomaly, not the standard when it comes to me speaking. Most of the time my words get lost and misunderstood. Most of the time I talk to fast and don’t speak clearly. Most of the time, I end up having to repeat myself, even when I slow myself down. It is very frustrating and irritating. Thankfully, my friends and family are usually pretty patience with me but, it doesn’t alleviate my frustrations.
The only time when I am clear, is usually through my writing. And even then, only when I have the time to stop and constantly re-edit my work and then read it aloud to someone at least twenty times. I haven’t really been doing that on this blog lately because I am writing through my phone and it doesn’t come as natural for me.
So how do I fix this? How do I let myself be heard? Well, for one there are a couple great coach books I keep telling myself to but haven’t. After all, its easy to whine about a problem if I don’t fix it. But I don’t want to do that any more. Or at least I want to keep trying.
Another way I think would help, would be learning how to sing (properly on tune). I am absolutely terrified of public singing, or just anyone catching me hearing my voice. I think maybe making myself learn a new song every week and making myself sing it in public is a good start that will help me communicate better. I mean maybe it won’t, I am not doing a very good job explaining why (irony) but maybe I can write another blog later on to explain it (if it helps). I think of it a lot like Zoey Deshcenal in 500 Days of Summer telling Joseph Gorden Levitt to yell out obscenities in public for no reason, like Penis!
If I had a time machine
I’d go back
And tell me